The schemer

This week’s tweet is not much about fun. It’s in a way just a state­ment. IKEA paid a guy to stay in a room whe­re he’s being filmed all day. This was posted in quiet a few blogs alre­ady. And as Nils now turns out to be one of the top ger­man twit­ter users regar­ding coun­ted fol­lo­wers we had a short look at him.

You know, in the old days action artists did some­thing spe­cial. Some­ti­mes that was dis­tur­bing. And that kind of dis­tur­ban­ce was the essence of their art.
The art of this guy is just to sit and wait. But not in the Sid­ney Young­blood man­ner. He’s just wai­ting in a room for the new IKEA cata­lo­gue com­ing out in Sep­tem­ber and that’s all he does in August. And as the time runs out in August he tells us:

In the moment when he could real­ly do some­thing spe­cial, a thing he could have pre­pa­red him­s­elf for the last coup­le of weeks, he is not able to pre­sent it in a way that does not lea­ve ever­yo­ne bored behind: “I hope the post­man brings the new IKEA cata­louge. I’m real­ly loo­king for­ward for try­ing out my new life.”

Boy, IKEA stuff is not for life. It’s for not spen­ding much money. If that is a top­per of your old life and the star­ting point of your new, we’ve real­ly got no clue how simp­le you are.

If this pro­ject was just a litt­le bit more intel­li­gent may­be you could see some iro­ny in it. For sure the­re are some guys in twit­ter, that sit befo­re their com­pu­ter the who­le day. Seen that way this pro­ject could be a mir­ror to them. But how numb is it to say the solu­ti­on to that pro­blem was shop­ping?

This who­le thing is an old idea with no new ele­ments and it deals only with mini­ma­lism. A mini­ma­lism that is sup­po­sed to be spe­cial due to not ful­fil­ling expec­ta­ti­ons. Dear IKEA and Nils: We had none. And that’s going to be the essen­ti­al thing con­nec­ted to you.


The mixer

This week we just can’t igno­re the most dis­cus­sed new ger­man twit­ter user: It’s the Secretary-General of the ger­man par­ty SPD, Huber­tus Heil. He used twit­ter during his visit in the United Sta­tes, whe­re he atten­ded the Oba­ma show in Den­ver. The­re are qui­te inte­res­ting nega­ti­ve and posi­ti­ve reac­tions to this new hob­by of Mr. Heil. You can find the­se reac­tions in twit­ter and in an arti­cle of the ger­man life­style maga­zi­ne
Der Spie­gel.

It’s a cor­rect esti­ma­ti­on to say that some­ti­mes you’ll be cri­ti­ci­zed imme­dia­te­ly if you do some­thing for get­ting publi­ci­ty. You can see the arti­cle in Der Spie­gel qui­te easy­ily as that of kind of cri­ti­cism. But not every cri­ti­cism that comes up quick­ly is intrin­si­cal­ly wrong.

We don’t mind poli­ti­ci­ans doing things that nor­mal citi­zens do as well. We do mind if they’re just pre­ten­ding to do so. It’s one cha­rac­te­ris­tic of the poli­ti­cal stra­te­gy of Oba­ma, Heil’s idol and rea­son to come to Den­ver, to make clear he’s not that kind of faker. Belie­ve it or not. In Ame­ri­ca the media don’t belie­ve that com­ple­te­ly and the­re­for they’re tal­king about play­ing cards.

One thing that is crys­tal clear is that Heil’s sho­wing up on twit­ter was plan­ned as a part of his poli­ti­cal actions. You can see that in one of the dele­ted tweets of his account:

Most irri­ta­ting this plan did not result in pre­sen­ting any own poli­ti­cal idea. It also sounds like this who­le action wasn’t his own idea. And though twit­ter is much about pre­ten­ding and the idea that the­re is no non­con­for­mi­ty of tweets, becau­se the­se belong to the sub­jec­tive man­ner to descri­be rea­li­ty, Heil is defi­ni­te­ly a can­di­da­te for TMI to us.

This is so becau­se Heil con­ti­nuous­ly mixes pri­va­te, jour­na­listic and polit­cal stuff in his tweets. It’s not clear if he wants to be on twit­ter as a pri­va­te man, a poli­ti­ci­an or a jour­na­list. Actual­ly the­re are enough jour­na­lists and Heil’s pri­va­te life does not attract many peop­le.

In this week’s tweet this mixing is inherent:

Heil tells us that the mem­bers of the ger­man Bun­des­tag Rolf Müt­zenich and Niels Annen bought a skate­board and shoes during their visit and that they now can get back to work all toge­ther.

Is this a poli­ti­cal infor­ma­ti­on or a pri­va­te one? We do think it deals with pri­va­te mat­ters of Müt­zenich and Annen. And for sure the­re will be jour­na­lists to see this in a poli­ti­cal con­text. Anyhow, Heil does not make clear what rele­van­ce his tweets have and how they should be seen as.

Perhaps we should read Heil’s state­ments as the fol­lo­wing tweet should be read, whe­re he tells us how Oba­ma should call his wife:

Bull­shit. [1]

So final­ly it turns out that the twit­ter ques­ti­on to Mr. Heil has to be posed more exact­ly: “What the fuck are you doing?”


[1] fol­lo­wing Har­ry Frank­furt On bull­shit, Prince­ton Uni­ver­si­ty Press, 2005


You are not alone

This week’s tweet deals with the ques­ti­on: Who are you tal­king to?
Mr. bou­vierm tells us:

Who is Sarah? Well, that’s easy. Sarah is obvious­ly bou­vierm’s actu­al girl-friend. That’s not that much of a sur­pri­se becau­se Sarah is bou­vierm’s only con­tact in twit­ter. We real­ly hope this does not app­ly to his off­line life. Take just a second with us to have a look into this boy’s litt­le cos­mos.

Sad­ly enough Sarah gives updates only to fri­ends. Luck­i­ly enough you can read any­thing she wri­tes in twit­ter search. Well, it seems to be a hap­py coup­le so we don’t want to rush into the their rela­ti­ons­hip too much.

It’s inte­res­ting enough that bou­vierm tells twit­ter that the­re is going to hap­pen a sexu­al thing bet­ween him and Sarah ton­ight. Why does he do that? It might be that he doesn’t know anyo­ne can read his tweets and not only his only fol­lo­wer. Well, as you saw, even if you lock your updates they’re not real­ly locked.

But inso­far it could be part of a game or some­thing. You know the­se “hide and seek in the inter­net, alt­hough we’re a coup­le in rea­li­ty” games, don’t ya ? Bes­i­des, there’s no real advan­ta­ge in get­ting an SMS from twit­ter ins­te­ad get­ting it from your mobi­le, is the­re? You see, many ques­ti­ons ari­se from this infor­ma­ti­on alt­hough there’s no need for us to know more about it.

So, here’s a litt­le bit cri­ti­cal thin­king: Are we some kind of rude in having a look into that pri­va­te sphe­re? Well, that real­ly could be, but anyhow bou­vierm doesn’t seem to act that much on dec­en­cy him­s­elf…

… and is so busy we don’t think he cares that much:


The feedback

The tweet of this week is the fol­lo­wing:

This one real­ly made me laugh. In english it’s “Swal­low. Get­ting feed­back in a minu­te.” Well, may­be it’s just me having too much sexu­al moti­va­ted thoughts due to rea­ding too much hor­ri­ble stuff on twit­ter.

The real sto­ry must be some­thing like Fräu­lein Schnu­te is sho­cked, becau­se she gets feed­back soon to some­thing she doesn’t tell us. May­be some­thing con­nec­ted to her job. But how can we pos­si­b­ly get just that one pic­tu­re, just that one sto­ry?

There’s a dif­fe­rent sto­ry wit­hin this tweet that came up in my mind first. I don’t wan­na paint the who­le pic­tu­re to you. I’m sure you can do that on your own and in more fasci­na­ting colours than any­thing I could wri­te by now.

This com­bi­ned with the infor­ma­ti­on someo­ne bee­ing the more active part wit­hin this sto­ry should get a *feed­back* in a minu­te — real­ly sho­cked me.

Link: Have a look at Fräu­lein Schnute’s beau­ti­ful web­site to find out more about her.

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